Keeping Your Marriage Vows (2)

Introduction:

Seems that only time we hear of adultery from the pulpit is after the fact (MDR). This is the wrong focus. Last week, we talked about the proper place for sex, in that it is to occur inside the marriage relationship. It is an expression of love/care/devotion. We closed our lesson by discussing how we cannot affair-proof our marriages – but we can affair-proof our lives. Gal. 5:16 – we must make a commitment to walk by the Spirit.

I. Never think it can’t happen.

A.     1 Peter 5:8 – Devil very capable of disguising a trap that can ensnare the largest of spiritual giants.

1.     2 Sam. 11-12 – David.

2.     1 Cor. 10:12 – this is not something to be cocky about.

B.     Self Control and sexual purity flow from wisdom – not will power.  2 Pet. 1:5-6.

II. Never fight when you can run.

A.     This is a biblical principle.

1.     1 Cor. 6:18; Pro. 5:3-8; Eph. 5:3-4 (NIV)

2.     Mt. 5:27-28 – point of Jesus’ teaching: harboring impure thoughts in our heart will lead us down a path we do not want to go.

3.     Mt. 15:19 - A pure heart can help affair-proof our life.

B.     We can’t be indecisive about this. Can’t pretend that lust is not a problem.

C.     The key to maintaining self-control & sexual purity is avoiding temptation – not resisting temptation.

III. Never lay a foundation where you can’t build a home.

A.     Pro. 4:23 – we must guard our heart with all diligence.

B.     Friendships and emotional connections with the opposite sex lay a foundation that belongs only to our spouse.

IV. Realize adultery is a dry well.

A.     The Hebrew language had 3 words for love.

1.     Ra’ya (7474) – means “friend, companion, soul mate”.

2.     ‘ahabah (160) – means “deep affection; commitment.”

3.     ‘dod (1730) – means “to caress; to fondle”.

B.     All 3 expressions of love come together in the expression one flesh (Gen. 2:24).

1.     Gen. 2:24 – is not just the sexual union.

2.     But the mingling of 2 souls – involving emotion; heart; etc.

C.     Sometimes we look at love as a “flame.”  For a moment, lets view each expression of love as its own separate flame. (Ra’ya; ‘ahabah; ‘dod).

1.     One flame by itself will never be as hot as all three together.

2.     Consider what happens when a person has an affair.

D.     If I am to affair-proof my life, then my love for my spouse will involve all 3 aspects of love: Friendship; Commitment; Love expressed physically.

Conclusion:

A.     We need to study on matters like this.

B.     One who guards against adultery guards against a foolish mistake with immeasurable consequences.